April 9 and on 2015

8 04 2015

April 8
It is really difficult to imagian Alan Derkowitz with young hookers. Really hard. I have no idea wether the story is true or not but he is denying it, claiming himself and his reputation to be the true victim and is saying that he will prosecute for defamation all the way. I looked this up on the internet and could find NO COMMENTARY AT ALL. Not even on alex Jones. Not on Huffington. Nothing. Nobody is commenting on this? I find that hard to believe. I did find one article that was related that was of interest


I have been having a lot of difficulty getting into my wordpress site ,can’t get into it at all from FB anymore.
I saw a posting , supposedly from the FBI, warning wordpress users that ISIL sympathizers were compromising wordpress.

ISIL sympathizers? Now who could that be and why would anything I publish be a problem. A Joke. Or is it the FBI that is really doing something like this? Or CIA or defamation or any of many . Who knows. God knows Ive had
my writing under threat from all different sides for different reasons for years, some times with dire consequences. But USUALLY when publishing is interfered with it is from the left.

(later) yeah!!  i got into my site!! maybe it was just the computers in my building that were compromised in some way.  i am typing at Darrell’s computer and all is normal again.

April 16

Some warm weather ahead this weekend for the first sunny day day at the market.  I am ready to go but it doesn’t hurt to do more earrings.  We are going to sit down to that the next two days. Darrell has begun drawing in earnest again.  he is set up in front of the big picture window.  Not cartoons but his beautiful drawings at last!!  11162449_864414480290480_6503133389194380443_nI am gladdened to see the reuturn of this spirit . . . .after two years of illness, family deaths and emergencies  . . . I too feel depression, anxieties and fears and resentments flow away .. .I do not feel so hopeless and ‘done in.’  I have been going down to the gym and I am beginning to transform physically and emotionally.  perhaps it was talking out some diffivult stuff with Akicia, hard on me as it was, that brought me to the other side but I feel strong now, eager to engage in things. I plan to take out a loan and get new strings on my violin. Yesterday i began a serious job search.

April 17

spent most of the afternoon yesterday trying to find a new battery for my camera. Got it.   Tried to charge it up but the camera is still reading low battery. so it looks like i need a charger too.  Sooooo disapointed. For the price of a new battery and charger i could have gotten a new camera. i was really looking forward to being able to do some shooting.  I also wanted to photograph Darrell’s new drawing. It’s a remake of the stylised Eagle he once drew in Eugene, only this one is in color .  His choice of colors is excellent . . . having put a lot of detail into this so far however I think he is going to mop it up quick on the background, make it real simple to complete it in time.  Will i have time today to run to kinkos and make copies, have it digitalized onto a thumb drive and have a two up made for cards?  Don’t think so.  Here we are, after a long spell doing our ‘thing’ the way we used to. . . and we can’t do it. Can’t get the stupid camera charged up. I spent the last of my cash yesterday getting a large drawing of his out of the frame shop . . . I paid out more than the job was worth but fuck it, i was too lazy to scour the thriftstores for a second hand frame so.  Maybe those days are just OVER no matter how hard we try to re create them.

Saturday A.M

Going to be a good day.  Got my swim in yesterday ,hair cut, hats packed, camera fully charged.

Cooking up some grub for the Chief before the sun peeks up. I never did get that call back from

C.C.R . . . I left so many messages.  I know . . . . .it’s who WE LIKE.  So i can’t persue vocational rehab without it.  Ive been stonewalled.  when i ask for help . . . they won’t. Even when its their job.   Only to the extent that i can be an information source for their benifit . . . I ought to have been in Tacoma weeks ago. If they don’t want me here why the hell didn’t  they do what they are supposed to do so i can move.  But it doesn’t matter.  I have taken back my personal power.  No body needs to do anything to help me.  they never have .  I can do for myself without them, it works better that way . . . I pretty much HAVE to be an indepencent loner . . . ot worked for me in the past and it will work for me now.  it was this toughness that made Darrell like me to begin with . . . i don’t mean beat’m up toughness . . . a different kind . . . if I forfeit that I not onbly lose his respect I get stabbed in the back.And the front. knifed to death.

Sunday april 19

I did very well at the market. sold my best stuff quickly.  My heart was made so glad in anticipation this week.t gave me something to look forward to.  all the oher ‘alternative vendors’ were there. But it would be a brief moment of joy. A sign was posted informing us that a new ordinance had been passed requiring all vendors to have a business license and a side walk vendors permit to set up and that all violations would result in a citation.  You cannot imagine the dissapointment and let down that was being expressed . . and rebellion. The alternative vendors scene had grown over the past few years and it had become a vibrant and cool happening where people could try their wings if they had the innovation .  Apparently there were a few of the legitimate vendors that objected.  They have to pay for their spots inside the market. it aint cheap. They also have to pay the taxes.  We thought the city just wanted to make sure they got their tAXES.  others thought the legitimate vendors felt threatened because we were taking away business.  many thought the legitimate market had become so boring and staid . . .the same old same old year after year, plants and food and the same old jewelry and all the really cool people were out side on the sidewalks.  others thought it was part of the crack down on the homeless, people with disability and all other non conformists about town.  they had moped up the park scene, removed all the benches and passed something where if your buttis on the sidwalk you can be arrested or ticketed. No one hung out on the street corners any more. i t was good to see all the drugging and drinking clamped down on but why the artists??

Apparently the police had come through last weekend and given out warnings to the vendors that had set up. Now there were flyers given out informing us that there would be a meeting on WEd at the co op to discuss this and a plan of action.  Some people thought about finding an alternative spot to set up a real flea market on Saturdays. Some thought civil disobedience was a the way to go . . continue to show up despite the threats. others said they wouold just go ahead and pay the fees . Some could not afford them just now.       it is sad to see this developement but i guess it was inevitable. No one was hurting any one or hindering any one.  I sure loved the ambience and chatting with other vendors, the crisscross of ideas . . many people were travelers who brought back great stuff from all over, Alaska, Nepal, Central and South America.

At one time the farmer’s market WAS the alternative, now it has become the established. Gentrified.  Most of those guys own businesses elsewhere and many of them have shops and they just do the farmer’s market on weekends.  So i mean what kind of bite are we really taking out of their profits realistically?????

it’s not like we are the occupy movement camping out for months in the park.  We decided to call ourselves the people’s market.  The people’s market will meet on Wenesday to discuss strategy.

It looks like the end of an era i told Darrell. Those days when a cult of personality that revolved around spotted Horse the artist became a street and park phenomina that attracted all sorts of rebels are over now.    It HAD gottenout of hand and the police turned a blind eye for a long time whenever it took an ugly turn, covered up all the stabbings, robberies, rapes and murders going on.  For years i bore the burden of this scene, i was often the target of it as spottedHorse’s main support, when ever he was dissatisfied.  he was able through force of personality to mold that crowd into caryying out whatever story line he put out, and as much as i tried to clue people in for the most part they bought into it to the extent that it became a phenomina that caught the attention of the rest of the nation.  Then it all had to be rationalized.

When the cops finally did crack down, way way too late  it was too heavy and mostly targetted the most vulnerable the most mentally ill, not the hard core,   .  SpottedHorse had been rewarded with his own place ( andrea giving him a high five for ‘exposing’ her, we did it chief)  and there was no cult of personality any more, no more SpottedHorse genius -peddling his art. The war on the homeless began big time and it was the indigent indians,with drug and alchohol problemss that paid the highest price when theri rebel hero moved on.    Most of the ‘boys’ or the hard core hobos have their own apartments now and the ones who couldn’t maintain it were driven out of town or jailed.  The kids stopped hanging out on the street corners .. . . .but now it isn’t the ‘problem’ people they are cracking down on. It’s peacefull vendors of all backgrounds and cultures, old white guys and young graphic novelists, jewelry makers, hat makers, people like nancy who make lovely things out of beach glass and shells, Earnie the Navaho artist whose sense of design is astonishing.   people who seek to cultivate and share the enjoyment of beauty, the free enjoyment of life , barter and exchange of ideas.Poor people to be sure . . . .but i guess poor people are supposed to be trash now. Scum.  Only the elite matter. it is complete.  but rebellion is fomenting, a very different sort than the occupy type of stuff and the ‘masculine rage in the park’ scene that preceded it.

the end of an Era. My hat thing shut down just when I was hoping i could make enough to cover the hole i got into trying to be good to Darrell and his bro .




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